An RFP tells you what a client is asking for. Your relationships tell you what they need. 

The gap between the two is where most proposals either win or lose. 

Procurement language is written to be defensible, not revealing. The evaluation criteria reflect what can be scored, and not necessarily what will drive the decision. By the time a formal opportunity is published, the client already has a sense of who they are comfortable with, who they trust, and the type of partner they are looking for. The document codifies the process because the decision has been forming for longer. 

Relationship intelligence is the practice of understanding that context before the RFP is written. 

What it truly means to know your client 

It means understanding who makes the decision and who influences it. They are rarely the same and the influencers are often more accessible well before formal procurement begins. It means understanding the real challenge behind the stated scope. Every project tells a story. There is a reason this is happening now, why it hasn’t been resolved, a shift in leadership, and/or a growth trajectory that changed the requirements. When that context is understood, proposals are written very differently. 

It also means knowing the political context. Who championed this initiative? What has been tried before? What failed, and why? What is the client organization worried about that they did not putin writing? 

It means understanding the competitive landscape from the client’s perspective, not just your own. Which firms have they worked with? What has their experience been? Why and where are they looking for something different? 

How to gather the right information 

Show up before the procurement. Attend industry events, join client office hours, and engage in informal conversations across the organization. The goal isn’t to sell, it’s to listen and learn to understand. The same relationship-building that gives access to insight is what builds trust, and trust is what a capture strategy is ultimately building toward. 

Ask better questions in the meetings you are already having. Most BD conversations stay at the surface because the questions do. What keeps the client awake at night about this project? What would give them confidence in a partner six months into delivery? Those questions get to what matters. 

Pay attention to what the client pays attention to. What they publish, what they present. Understand what shows up consistently in industry conversations. Organizations signal their priorities constantly. Most competitors aren’t paying attention. 

What it changes 

When you have built genuine relationship intelligence before any RFPs, the proposal writes differently. The executive summary speaks to what the client truly cares about, not what the template calls for. The win theme is specific to this opportunity, not carried over from the last one. The team section explains why these specific people, for this specific project, and it lands because it’sgrounded in truth. 

The difference is visible early. Proposals built on real client intelligence read with clarity and intent. Those built from the RFP alone do not. Evaluators feel it, even if they can’t immediately name why.  

The intelligence is the strategy. Everything that follows, the workshop, the proposal, the interview and presentation, is execution. Start there.